We Will Remember, But How?

Two years ago, to this day, I lost my Dad.

On the first anniversary, I had decided to hide from anything that reminded me of Dad. We left England for Christmas and instead of returning in the New Year, I booked our return trip early, on the 30^th December 2018. I figured that by keeping myself busy with a day of travelling, I would not need to think about it. Of course, I was very wrong. I had left myself feeling alone, with lots of thinking time and nothing familiar to comfort me.

We Should Remember

Personally, I have grown massively this year. I now know how important it is that we do remember Dad. We should not try to hide from the precious memories we have, or to deny Dad of the remembrance that he deserves.

This year, my approach to Dad’s anniversary was different, but mostly because I feel that I am more ready to face it than I was last year.

Dad’s Days

Throughout the year, we made a promise, my husband, my children and I, that we would have 4 ‘Bapa Days’. These days are 30^th December (of course), 30^th March (as it is close to Easter and Easter was always spent with Dad), 30^th June (close to Father’s Day) and 30^th September (Dad’s birthday). On these days, we have been celebrating Dad by doing something that reminds us of him.

This could be donating to charity, buying gifts for the children, giving to those less fortunate than us, listening to Dad’s favourite music and much, much more.

Today, on Bapa Day, I placed a freshly picked bouquet in the remembrance garden we have created, as well as some Christmas decorations. We made a jar filled with our favourite memories of Dad and we read some out to each other. We ordered his favourite dishes from the Indian takeaway and I begrudgingly toasted him with his beloved Guinness, yuk!

Wonderful Memories

Without realising, we had spent an age reminiscing and smiling about some of our fondest memories with Dad. This by far has been a full day dedicated to Dad, as it should have been and I regret not realising how important it was, last year.

More Moments to Come

My darling husband completed the day with a thoughtful touch. We received a delivery, for the kids and myself, with a gift and a note, signed by Bapa. Carl had organised for the delivery of course, it contained a beautifully gift wrapped memorial key ring, with angel wings and a Dad pendant.

Carl loved Dad as his own, they had so much in common and I genuinely feel that Carl brought me and Dad closer together. With the kids bringing the bond, closer still.

Dad will be watching down today and realising just how much he was loved by us all. But also, just how much love his son-in-law has for his daughter…he will feel so proud and excited to share the rest of our moments with us.

He may also be cursing me a little for sharing some of the stories that made us all chuckle! Sorry Dad, I love you xx